Match Preview: Can Andorra Survive the Onslaught?
England’s new era under Thomas Tuchel continues as the Three Lions take on Andorra in a 2026 World Cup qualifier at Barcelona’s RCDE Stadium (because apparently, Andorra doesn’t have a big enough pitch for this mismatch).
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England’s form: ✔ 2 wins, ✔ 5 goals, ✔ 0 conceded under Tuchel
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Andorra’s form: ❌ 0 points, ❌ 0 wins, ❌ Praying for a miracle
With England sitting top of Group K and Andorra rock bottom, this should be a glorified training session—but stranger things have happened in football (cough Iceland 2016 cough).
Tuchel’s England: Smooth Sailing (So Far)
Since taking over, Tuchel has:
✅ Beaten Albania & Latvia
✅ Kept three straight clean sheets
✅ Made England fans cautiously optimistic again
Key players to watch:
Harry Kane (because who else?)
Eberechi Eze (the new flair in midfield)
Myles Lewis-Skelly (the next big thing?)
Biggest concern? England only winning 3-0 last time out. Some fans want ruthlessness—will this be the game where they finally hit double digits?
Andorra: The Ultimate Underdogs (With Zero Hope)
Reasons Andorra Might Lose:
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They’re ranked 173rd in the world (behind teams you’ve never heard of).
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They’ve lost 24 of their last 25 competitive games (their one win? Against San Marino—the football equivalent of beating a traffic cone).
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They haven’t scored in FOUR games (their attack is about as threatening as a wet noodle).
Manager Koldo Alvarez’s game plan?
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Park the bus (then park another bus behind it).
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Hope England gets bored (and takes a nap mid-match).
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Pray for a freak deflection (their best chance at a goal).
Head-to-Head: A History of Pain (For Andorra)
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Last 6 meetings: England wins, 18 goals scored, 0 conceded.
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Biggest win: 8-0 (2010, when even Emile Heskey scored).
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Andorra’s best performance? Keeping it to 2-0 once (a moral victory).
Prediction: How Bad Will It Get?
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Optimistic England fans: *"5-0, let’s rotate the squad!"*
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Pessimistic England fans: *"1-0, boring Tuchelball."*
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Andorra fans: "Just don’t concede in the first minute."
Final guess? 6-0 England—because even the substitutes will score.
Why You Should Watch (Or Not)
✔ Harry Kane padding his goal tally (he’s chasing records).
✔ England’s fringe players auditioning (someone’s got to impress Tuchel).
✔ The slim chance of a historic Andorra upset (lol, just kidding).
Your Turn:
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What’s your score prediction?
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Should England go for 10+ goals, or is that just mean?
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Will Andorra EVER score against England?